


He's Not Into Boys

by manchestereye (orphan_account), SweetDreamsDarling, yellowyellowyellowye



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 05:31:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20384467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/manchestereye, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetDreamsDarling/pseuds/SweetDreamsDarling, https://archiveofourown.org/users/yellowyellowyellowye/pseuds/yellowyellowyellowye
Summary: Dan has a crush. A big crush. And it's on his bestfriend. Oh dear.





	He's Not Into Boys

**Author's Note:**

> also posted on @flowerpotphil on tumblr!
> 
> There are 2 more people who collaborated on this fic, so when they're revealed I'll add them to the writers

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The alarm blared directly into my ears, hitting me with a headache the instant I opened my eyes. I could see the sun poking through the blinds and I checked the clock: 6:45 A.M. The time glared back at me, the first sign of what I already knew would be a bad day, thanks to the bad feeling sitting in my stomach.

My eyelids began to flutter and close, the temptation of going back to sleep becoming overwhelming.

Knock. Knock.

A knock at my door jolted my eyes open. I looked over at the clock: 6:48 A.M. A whole three extra minutes. My door creaked open and I saw my Mum’s head poke in.

“Dan, it’s time to get up!” She said, somehow smiling before 7 A.M. I could smell the coffee wafting in from downstairs and understood how she was cheery that early in the morning.

Using all the energy I had, I pulled the covers off the top of me and sat up. A yawn escaped my lips. I stood up and stretched a little before realizing my Mum was still there.

“I’ll be down in a minute, Mum.” I said with a smile before walking over to my door and closing it so I could get dressed. I made my way over to my closet to pick out my outfit for the day which consisted of a band t-shirt and some black skinny jeans. The outfit was plain but comfortable, exactly what I was going for.

I went into my bathroom quickly to study how I looked in the mirror. The person staring back at me displeased me, as per usual. Same curly brown hair, pale skin, and muddy eyes. I pulled out my straightener, getting to work on the one thing in that list I could actually change. After a few minutes of working, I looked in the mirror and saw a straight fringe staring back. No, it wasn’t exactly what I wanted but it was much better than my natural hobbit-like hair.

With myself looking what I would call “presentable”, I grabbed my school bag and went downstairs, hoping some coffee and breakfast would be waiting for me. The coffee I smelled earlier seemed to confirm my hopes as I slid into the kitchen, where my Mum had poured me a cup and made me a bowl of cereal. A note sat next to it reading “Have a good day! Love, Mum.”

I smiled after reading the note before inhaling the cereal and coffee. A burst of energy was exactly what I needed, and the coffee did just that. I put away my dishes and checked the time: 7:32 A.M. Time to go.

The sun was bright as I stepped out my front door and began walking to the bus stop. A familiar face greeted me with a smile, happy as always.

“Hey!” Phil shouted, his cheery attitude becoming infectious. Something about this boy always made me happy, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it. It probably has something to do with the fact that we’re best friends.

“Hi Phil.” I said as I got closer to him. We stood on the pavement together, awaiting our transportation to the place I fondly call ‘Hell’.

“Oh, before I forget, my Mum said you could come over tonight,” Phil said, breaking the small amount of silence between the two of us, “Y’know, if you still want to.”

“Why wouldn’t I want to come over?” I questioned.

“I guess I wasn’t thinking.” He shrugged and laughed.

I smiled and continued the conversation, us talking about video games and television shows until the bus came and all the way to school. The school day was long and tedious, dragging on and on. I stared at the clock in my last class, counting the minutes until I could leave. My mind wandered, thinking about all the things Phil and I would be doing when we hung out later. Suddenly, the bell rang and I leaped out of my seat, rushing to the bus as fast as possible.

Phil joined me and soon our conversation picked up as if it had never ended this morning. The bus dropped us off at our stop and we walked back to his place together. At this point, I’d stayed over at his so much that I no longer needed to even stop at my place to get anything. All the stuff I needed to spend the night was already there since I had a bad habit of leaving things behind.

“-and I got the new Sims game so we can play around with that.” Phil said, continuing to talk as we entered his house. I pulled off my shoes and kept walking upstairs to his room. He followed along, as per usual.

“Yeah we can do that. But if we’re staying up all night playing games, can I take a nap first?” I asked, as I flopped onto his bed. “School was exhausting today.” A yawn slipped out.

“No problem, I’ll probably join you.” Phil said with a laugh, sitting on the bed next to me. I scooted over, so we both had enough room to lie down on the bed. Our sides touched as we lay next to each other. A comfortable silence crept across the room and sat in the air for a few minutes. I stared at the ceiling, a question in my head preventing me from falling asleep.

“Hey, Phil?” I asked, not sure if he had drifted off yet.

“Yeah?” He responded, sounding wide awake.

“Do you think it’s weird that we always sleep in the same bed?”

“No, not really. Do you?”

“No.” I said with a bit of confidence. I could feel myself exhale, finally relaxing. The comfortable silence filled the room again. My eyelids began to flutter and close until I finally drifted off to a peaceful nap.

When I woke up a few hours later, I could smell dinner cooking downstairs. Phil wasn’t by my side anymore, so I got up and went to the bathroom to fix my hair before going down. There was a knock on the bathroom door, and I opened it to see Phil standing there.

“Hey! I was just gonna wake you up since it’s time for dinner!” Phil smiles.

I smile back at him. He’s so wonderful and caring. My other friends aren’t like him at all. Maybe that’s why it’s so comfortable for us to be so close to each other. I don’t think I could live a life without him. We grew up together, and we’re inseparable. Some people find it annoying, but I don’t care.

Dinner was lovely. Kathryn asked us about school and how things were going. She’s very pleasant, and I’ve always trusted her.

We went back up to Phil’s room right after dinner, and he opened up the Sims on his laptop. I looked over at him while he was focusing on the sim character on the screen. He giggled at the sim doing something stupid.

What am I feeling? Why do I like being so close to him? This isn’t normal, I’ve never felt this with any of my other friends.

He looks so perfect, and handsome….

“Dan!” Phil yells, snapping me out my thoughts.

“Huh? Yeah, okay what’s up?”

“You seem kind of distracted,” Phil points out. “Are you alright?”

I give him a little grin. “Yeah, perfectly fine.”

We play a few other games once he gets bored of the Sims. He asks me if I have anything I’d like to play. I shake my head.

“We’re at your house, Philly. You can play whatever you want.” I tell him.

Phil just shrugs at that and sets up Fireboy and Watergirl.

We laugh at each other every time we get stuck or fall into the green liquid.

This has always been nice, laughing with him and having fun. Today feels different for some reason, why?

I turn to look at him again. He’s smiling brightly, and his tongue is sticking out to the side of his mouth, something that he does whenever he’s really happy.

I grab his hand. He squeezes it tightly.

That’s when it hits me.

I’m in love with my best friend.

I push it to the back of my mind and get back to the game that we’re playing. I don’t have to deal with this right now, besides, Phil might not like me like that.

Sure, he’s never fancied anyone, but that doesn’t automatically mean that he’s gay or anything. Hell, I don’t even know if I’m gay or anything. All I know is that I really like Phil.

But people frown upon that here in this town, so even if we did like each other, it wouldn’t be good for us.

  
We’re up until around one in the morning. Phil always says he’s gonna make it to the end of the night, but he’s never successfully pulled an all-nighter.

I move the laptop over to the desk next to his bed, and curl up beside him as I fall asleep.

The first thing I noticed when I woke up was the smell. No, not a bad one, but the residual Lynx of the day before. As I came more to my senses, I felt a weight on my left arm, and my right leaning on something warm.

Then it came to me.

Phil was asleep still, only my arms were wrapped around him. He was facing me, glasses nearly off his face - they were black with thick frames - and he was bundled into my arms.

The instinctual thing was to panic, but the brave side of me told me to hold him until he woke up. I couldn't say the words, I could never say "Phil I think I'm in love with you" because then it would be a harsh reality shock of me liking boys, and he could just reject me and never be friends with me again. So I held him. I don't know how long it took for me to fall back asleep, my heart was bouncing around my chest like a basketball, but I eventually did.

"Dan?"

"Daniel?"

"Wake up already!"

"Daniel James Howell, wake up!"

I was already awake, but I didn't want to open my eyes. Phil could easily tell me to get out if he knew I was awake. He blew on my eyes, then flicked my head.  
"I know you're awake! Your eyes fluttered!"  
I opened my eyes, Phil was still nestled close to me and my arms were still around him.

"Oh, good morning, I don't know why we're like this, lying like this, I mean-" I started to ramble a bit, a nervous flaw I'd always had.

"I'm not complaining, I'm cozy here." It was avoiding the elephant in the room, but sometimes that's a good thing.

I didn't go back to sleep after that, but Phil did. He'd taken his glasses off and discarded them somewhere on the bed. Normally he'd have placed them on his desk to save them breaking, but it didn't seem like he cared. Or maybe he was just tired.  
He couldn't like a boy like me, in fact there was no way Phil could like boys in general, he'd had a girlfriend for a week or so! Definitely, totally, completely not into boys. Nope.

It was getting on for 11 AM when he woke up, I had just lay there holding him; my heart never did seem to calm down with him there.  
"What time is it?" He asked, reaching up to rub his eyes.  
"Nearly 11."  
"Thank you, it's nearly lunch, I hope mum is cooking something good."

On instinct, we both sniffed to try and decipher what Kath was cooking. Smelled like meat of some sort - oh the irony.

"Phil, should I leave?" I asked, the elephant was now sitting on my chest, it felt so heavy.  
"Do you want to?"  
"No..."

Phil untangled himself a bit, and looked up at me. My heart sank, he didn't love me, he just didn't want to tell me and make me sad.

"Well I don't want you to leave, or even move." He affirmed, but part of me couldn't quite believe.  
"You're just saying it, I know you are."

Phil sighed, and rolled his eyes. He didn't often do it, and I would know, he has always been my best friend. He was a gentle person, he knew how to word things so people wouldn't get hurt, and he genuinely adored life. And dogs. Maybe he liked dogs more than life. Probably. You couldn't ask for a better person, and I was so happy to have him in my life.

That may have all gone down the drain. 

"I'm going to do something, and that something might be the worst decision I've ever made. And I've made some bad ones, like that time I was playing follow the leader, stopped in front of a wall, and broke my nose. I'm rambling, but I've made some bad moves."

I didn't reply, I didn't want to ruin what he was about to do. 

I'd never kissed anyone before, and he hadn't either - he'd leave the relationship before ever kissing a girl.  
It was awkward, our teeth clashed slightly, and we weren't in a good position, but Phil kissed me.

"You don't like boys." What a stupid thing to say, but it blurted out before I could think of anything else better to say.

  
"You can't say that to me, because I do." Phil was sincere, he had a look in his eyes, like some lost puppy, "I always have, and it's just been a tiny thing I never thought of properly until recently. You might hate it, but it's just been you in my head, and that's so cliché"

Oh. He had the same thing.

"Well, we skipped the whole dating thing and jumped straight into bed!" my joke seemed to shatter the tense feel.  
"Dan! Don't let my mum hear you! She'll kill us both!"

We both laughed, and it felt nice. For once, something had fallen into place.

And I guess we are living the whole 'friends to lovers' dream!


End file.
